Funny, I Wasn’t Talking About You!

December 1, 2010

It’s the weirdest thing! I use to have this issue on a certain site, which I am no longer am a member of or care to name, as I would write my rants there quite often. Sometimes I do write in my blog about those of my past and a few of my present, whom I don’t care for or I still have an gripe about. But the oddest thing is, on that site and in this blog, I sometimes get the attention of the WRONG people in my rants. Dude, I’m not talking about you! :-p

It’s pretty funny (yet a little disturbing!), when I have posted a heated rant about someone and the wrong person comments, worried that I am secretly speaking about them. Because for every apologetic worry that I get, it’s always NOT the person that I was secretly griping about. I’ve yet to hear from the guilty parties (and doubt I ever will!), about a rant of me feeling hurt, alienated, or used by them. At the previous site, many of them had access to my posts there and it was public for all to see, so I’m very sure those people read it and thought, “Pfft! She ain’t talking about me.” and moved on. But the cool and awesome people always seem to rush to me, in private messages, stating their case and screaming that they didn’t mean to hurt me. WHAT???

No, for those kind and considerate souls, I always assure them that I wasn’t speaking about them! In fact, because they are so kind, supportive, and generally good people, I would NEVER write such a post about them in any forum or in this blog. If they hurt my feelings, I am respectful and caring enough to speak on it with them, in private messages. So you guys and girls need not worry! I only post my gripes here (and on the previous site before), after a “friendship” went extremely wrong and the private messages of asking that person to not hurt me anymore than they had fell on death ears.

Is is wrong of me to moan and gossip about the self-serving bastards who took advantage of me in my past or is draining me now? Probably. But is that my way of dealing with those who don’t give me any care or consideration, insisted that I should just bend over and take it, while asking me to be  respectful to not call them out publicly? Well, yes it is. This is my way, to write in a blog or forum about the crap people send my way. I feel better and can move on, after I’ve printed something in black-in-white. It may be wrong, but it’s me and it’s how I cope.

Meanwhile, I guess my consequence for it is that the awesome people in my life will always worry. But, I really don’t wish that for them! And they are the only ones who read my blog, along with a few strangers (only a few), as none of the really bad “friends” of my past know of this site. And if they did know of this blog, they wouldn’t care to read it in the first place. So, this is like a sanctioned ground to scream at the top of my lungs, to get the stress out. Don’t worry, I’m not screaming at you. ;-)

But it does make me wonder… How come when I’m writing about a person, without naming names, it’s the awesome ones who worry? Same with when I speak about someone in person (offline), it’s never that person who stands up and say, “Oh, I didn’t know I made you feel that way! I didn’t mean to! I’m so sorry!” I just get an attitude of, “You’re not speaking about me. And if you are, that’s YOUR personal issue, not mine. I’m perfect!”

When my friends or family complain about something I do wrong, to hurt them or make them uncomfortable, I listen. Honestly, it’s never easy to admit when I’m wrong on something, yet if the person has a valid point, then I have to admit the wrong and apologize. AND, I try not to do or say the thing that has hurt the person ever again. It’s what grown-ups do, after-all. But, if I was all into myself, not caring and deciding that a person’s feelings didn’t matter (as long as I get to do what I want), then that person would be in their right to gripe about me in their own blog too.

But, for the record, that’s not me. I’m not one to not care about the feelings of others, when it’s bought to my attention that I’ve gone too far. I only not care about the feelings of people who don’t care about the feelings of anyone else, except for themselves. The way I figure it, if a person cares only about themselves and situations, with no care or consideration for friends or family, then that person doesn’t need me to care for them too. Because that person already has all the care they need, from themselves! :-p

But for those who read my blog, in the words of Conan, “Be cool, my babies! Be cool!” :-)




  1. You and I know all about this cos we went through it together at the place we ain’t naming and oddly enough I wrote about it before I saw this entry of yours. Strange, eh?
    But anyway my thoughts are very similar to yours.That’s to say deal with stuff as far as possible via PM’s but if it’s not getting anywhere then I’ll consider writing about the experience without naming the individual in part to get it out of my system and also in part to alert others to trends (what they do with it is naturally their own business).And above all else move on from the rubbishy way others have treated us and maybe have a higher regard for what we we will accept from others in the future.
    Hugs galore, Caroline.

  2. True! We do seem to think alike. =p
    Yep, the misfire at that unnamed place was rampant! You and I weren’t the only ones who got the attention of innocent readers, afraid that they’ve hurt someone by mistake. It was a common misunderstanding for about five other people too, that I once knew there. :-/
    Though, it’s kinda funny… the real jerks of the site never thought the posts were about them, but the nice people almost always thought it was about them! That’s when I began putting in the line of, “if you’re on my friend list, I’m not talking about you.” Which kinda hurt my venting and ranting pace! LOL.

    Now, this blog isn’t well known or followed, like my post of that unnamed site were… I’ve only gotten two misfires here, so far. But, I thought to post this to try to nip things in the bud, before that starts up again.

    It’s the price of gossip, I guess. ;-)

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